If you have ever worked for a company, more than likely had to work under another person, the manager or overseer. The job of the overseer is to make sure those they supervise are doing their job accurately and efficiently. The tone is set within the department by the one who is responsible for everyone under them. Whatever the overseer allows or does not allow will determine the success of the company as a whole.
So fathers, how are you setting
the tone for your family?
This is where the old saying “actions speak louder than words” reigns true. Your children are watching you, even when you least expect it. Sons are looking to see who they will become when they get older and daughters are looking to see what qualities to look for in a husband. The question is, would you want your daughter to marry someone like you or for your son to grow up being like you?
If the answer is no and the thought of it convicts you,
that means it is time for a change.
Your children need to see you loving and respecting your wife, walking with integrity at all times, and doing whatever is in your power to provide and protect your family. They need to see you control your anger when something makes you upset yet be assertive in providing discipline and guidance. Children need to see that you are a man of your word and that they can rely on you at all times. Though it is your job to oversee and lead, this is not to say that you won’t make mistakes. An imperfect father can still lead by example. When you recognize that you have missed the mark, owning up to your shortcomings and changing your ways, shows your children the actions of a true leader.
A positive father’s presence or lack thereof has a major impact on children.
Not everyone is able to say that they’ve had their father in their life. Unfortunately, there are a lot of people who never knew their father. Some can say that their father was around but not present. Others can say that though they did not live with their father, he was still active in their life. Yet there are also many who had the privilege of having their father both in the household and present in their lives. I’m blessed to be one of those people. I don’t know what your situation may have been but in some form or another, it shaped you into who you have become.
With the title of father, comes many responsibilities. You are accountable for disciplining and giving instructions to your children. Not only that, but you are to protect, provide for, and be present in your children’s life. Now I know there are some good men who do not live in the same home but will do everything possible to be the father their child needs. Unfortunately, some mothers may withhold these privileges from you. My advice to you is to do everything possible to make it happen. Even if you hit a brick wall, get frustrated or feel like it’s a waste of time, don’t ever stop trying. The most important thing is that your child sees that you are trying.
Be aware that the enemy will come and try to steal,
kill and destroy your family.
That is why it is so important to have other men around you that will hold you accountable to being the best husband and father you can be to your wife and kids. Since you are the head of your family, if the enemy can get you distracted, this will open up a portal for him to have his way with your family.
This is why God created order when He designed the family.
First and foremost He is the Source and therefore at the top of the hierarchy. After God, is the husband who should receive his directions on how to lead his family, directly from the Source. Chaos begins when the husband is no longer aligned with God. Don’t believe me, just read the story about Adam and Eve. The point I’m trying to make here is that men are so important to the success of a family. You are the second in command to God himself. This position shouldn’t be taken lightly or for granted. That is how much value God has placed in you.
Now on this father’s day, I encourage those who are good fathers to continue paving the way for your children and allowing your actions to minister to those who are trying to find their way. For the fathers who know they haven’t been all they can be, it’s not too late. Even if your children have grown up, you can still create a new relationship with them. To the fathers who are absent for whatever reason, let this serve as an encouragement to change the narrative of both you and your children’s story.
To those, both men and woman, who may be estranged from your father, I pray that God will unharden your heart and help you make the first step to forgiveness.
Life is too short to hold grudges and bitterness towards the man who gave you life. For everyone who has lost their father, my heart goes out to you on this day. May God comfort and bring the best of memories back to you. For all others, celebrate your father on today. Whether or not he was perfect or flawed, he will always be your father. Happy Father’s Day!!
In Relentless Pursuit,
“Now the overseer is to be above reproach, faithful to his wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not given to drunkenness, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him, and he must do so in a manner worthy of full respect.” – 1 Timothy 3:2-4 NIV